So, it's Christmas break and my parents are kind enough to host us for the holidays. Thank goodness because you can't make stuff like this up . . .
At 6:32AM yesterday, my tiny mother strolled in, smothered in her robe. She poured a bowl of rice crispies. Then . . . marshmallows? Butter?
She put the concoction in the microwave. And afterward began to consume what turned out to be an individual-sized batch of rice crispy treats.
I said, "Are you seriously eating rice crispy treats for breakfast? Seriously?"
"It's just grain and sugar. Oatmeal is grain and sugar," she said.
I plopped the computer on the dining room table and started typing.
Then she said, "Like a granola bar. Sugar and grain."
She kept going.
"With fat free milk, you get protein. Like a continental breakfast of Danish rolls. That's sugar and grain."
She began her morning devotional, and read happily aloud from her scriptures.
"Nehemiah 8:10 ' . . . go your way, eat the fat, and drink the sweet . . . neither be ye sorry . . .'"
I can only guess what her next comment might be. Probably, "That's all oranges are: orange flavoring and sugar."
This explains everything.